" I know the plans that I have for You"

So Tuesday at 11 was Eric's appointment... They told us to be there no later than 10:30am! Well, trying to get from our house to Duke by 10:30, with an infant, was not something I was looking forward to. Our day started at about 6:15. Avoiding the full story of the rushing, stress, etc....let's just say we made it.

First of all, I need to make mention of the fact that Duke Medical Center is insane! It's on a whole 'nother level as far as hospitals go. That place had like 14 parking decks, 40 million elevators, too many different floors and wings, but they had it so well laid out (with excellent signs and maps) that you never felt lost or disoriented. We were walking around with our mouths hanging open like tourists....it was impressive!

Eric was sent to the Morris Cancer Clinic to see Dr. Shalini Ramasunder. It was kinda discouraging to be sent to the Cancer ward, but we just tried to ignore it. Once we got in there though, it was a hard fact to ignore. The place was huge!! (Probably 75 people in the waiting room!) And everywhere you looked people looked downcast, many women were walking around with scarfs on there heads and sunken eyes from a recent chemo treatment. It was a very heavy atmosphere. I was glad that I had Addisyn because she kinda was a bright spot for everyone in there. I almost cried though when one woman came up to me and said "Tell me you aren't here for her...tell me she's healthy and doesn't have cancer." Intense stuff...

So after almost two hours of waiting (not easy with a 3 month old)...we got in to see the doctor. Now, Eric and I had developed a picture in our mind of what we thought Dr. Ramasunder would be like. Our opinion included her probably being a nerd and more than likely not speaking English. We were wrong. She spoke English probably better than I do and she was not a nerd at all! She was super down to earth and even kept us laughing. All I could think to myself was "she should be on Grey's Anatomy because she's super cute and funny, but I bet she is a beast of a surgeon" (I mean, you don't get to be an orthopaedic surgeon at Duke without being amazing).

Anyways, she felt Eric's foot and looked at the MRI and "deliberated" with her residents that she was training (again, very Grey's Anatomyish). When she came back into the room, she told us that she couldn't feel a distinct mass in his foot. Usually if it's a synovial sarcoma (cancer) she can feel the tumor. Also after looking at the MRI, she didn't think it looked like a sarcoma either. (I know that doesn't sound very convincing, but she gave a lot more reasons I just can't remember them.)

So the good news is that it doesn't look like Eric's tumor is cancer! Praise God! Instead, she says its a type of vascular tumor called a hemangioma, which is basically a clump of blood vessels in a place where they shouldn't be, surrounded by a layer of fat. This was her diagnosis, but she is also going to consult with the radiology team at Duke and let us know for sure in the next few days. The other good news is that she doesn't think she needs to operate (or more like she doesn't think she CAN operate...so much for her career on Grey's). She said that in order for her to be able to take out the mass, she would need to know what she was taking out. If she opened up his foot, she said that the hemangioma, because it is just blood vessels, would look very much like everything else in his foot. She doesn't want Eric to have to go through major foot surgery if she isn't sure that she can take out the mass (and if it's not malignant...she doesn't feel the urgency either).

I think that's great for right now because surgery on the bottom of your foot is a HUGE deal to recover from. Eric is pleased and relieved but also a little bummed because he's still in a lot of pain. Once were done with the cancer/surgery drama of it all...he will be seeing another doctor for options on how to manage the pain.

All in all...I am so thankful! God is so amazing. When you sit in a doctor's office at 23 years old and they tell you that it's a possibility that your husband may have cancer...it's not a fun feeling. I don't even need to write all the things that went through my mind...i'm sure anyone can guess. But I worked hard to fight the devil and take those thoughts captive! And to constantly stand on the fact that my God is big and His plans for my life are for welfare and not for calamity!! Thank you Jesus for seeing us through!